Editor's Note--Well then! Happy New Year! Today is more important than that other New Year's Eve anyway. The college football has started with a few games, but it's NFL Week 1. Lucky for you, the Big Kahuna (Hawaiian for expert in his field) will be opining on BOTH college and pro this week. 3 each. What fun! And by fun, I mean MONEY!! Hope your summers went swimmingly, but now it's the REAL season, baby! Take it away Big D!!!!--R.B.
Thank you Richie and hello to all of you. Now that's enough pleasantries. Let's get to work.
Purdue has some problems at the QB position. EASTERN MICHIGAN (from one of our favorite conferences, the MAC) does NOT. Purdue is from the "big bad Big 10". But we think the oddsmaker priced that in and waaaaaaaaaaaay more. Some might think 16.5 points looks low. Not us. These MAC teams enjoy these matchups against "the big boys". Too many pal. Take the EAGLES from Ypsilanti!
Jo-jah (Georgia) is on almost everyone's short list to make it the NCAA Playoff this year. It looks like the oddsmaker thinks so too. Cause dem dawgs are layin 10 points at 24th ranked SOUTH CAROLINA. Playing double digit road favorites in the SEC puts you in the poor house, friend. We aint in no poor house. GAMECOCKS may win outright. Take.
Finally, it looks like Notre Dame is back! But as you know, 1 game does not a season make. They have "creampuff" BALL STATE (there's that MAC conference again!)at home and lay a fat 37.5 points. The CARDS may be outmatched, but they will try. The Irish might be a little less motivated after the big win against Harbaugh last week, and don't want to get any injuries for the rest of the season. We like the plethora of points. Takey. Go Mid American Conference!
Now Sunday, we really enjoy that the "experts" are going to tell us who will be going to the Super Bowl or even the AFC/NFC Championship Games before a snap is even taken. Why do we say that? Well, CLEARLY even the 1970s Steelers, 1980s 49ers, and the 2000s Pats ALWAYS had trouble laying points on the road. And THOSE teams were DYNASTIES. Ergooooo.....
Does Big Ben have a right arm still? Just kidding. However, don't the BROWNS give Pittsburgh fits? Yes. Yes they do. Last year Pittsburgh won both games. By a total of 7 points. Top fantasy RB Bell for Pitt is still holding out, CLEVELAND has a pretty brand new look, and fans will be rabid on Lake Erie. Steelers going to the Super Bowl? That line is tellin you they're going VERY far. We aint buyin it yet, pal. Take the divisional home puppies +4......
This is an actual conversation that went on this week as Richie glanced at his newspaper (not the digital kind)...Richie: "Billy you said you were going to the GIANTS game this week. You're flying to Jacksonville? That is some kinda dedication...." Billy: "Richie, the game is in the MEADOWLANDS in JERSEY." Richie (to no one in particular): "DO THEY HAVE SPORTSBETTING LEGAL IN FLORIDA YET?!? CAUSE I'M GOING TO THE BANK RIGHT NOW AND RUNNING TO THE WAGERING WINDOWS. Jax is FAVORED by 3.5 AT ELIIIIIIIII?!?!?" Yes, Richie the Jaguars are favored AT ELI MANNING. Go figure huh? My how times have changed. We figure the G-MEN will win outright. We'll take the 3.5 though just for an easy winner.
Finally, following our theme of "fake dynasty news", the la rams are going to the Super Bowl too? Interesting. Well, how else can you explain them laying 4.5 on Monday Night Football in OAKTOWN vs CHUCKY and DA RAYYYYYYDUUUUUUHSSSS??!? Can you imagine the face on CHUCKY in that locker room when he tells the SILVER AND BLACK that they are UNDERDOGS of 4.5 in HIS return (they ALL know the pointspread, believe us)?!?!?! Saints preserve us! CARR can zing the ball down the field for sure! LYNCH can still run like Flash. Sure they traded MACK on defense, but they're still Ok there. Too much credit to the "vaunted" ram attack. CHUCKY is grumpy. DA RAYYYYYYYYYDUHS fight it out, handsomes.....Take.
So the "opening weekend happy recap": Saturday: EASTERN MICHIGAN+16.5 @ purdue, SOUTH CAROLINA+10 vs Georgia, BALL STATE+37.5 @ notre dame. Sunday: CLEVELAND+4 vs Pittsburgh, NY GIANTS+3.5 vs jacksonville, Monday: OAKLAND+4.5 vs la rams.
Welcome back to football everyone. A fabulous feeling, yes? The next video never gets old. So, of course we had to play it. The second is pretty good too. Now if you borrowed Richie's cologne, you should return it like the nice man says in the song....Good luck and god bless!!